Envelope Addressing Tips
Envelope addressing etiquette is…confusing. When we were addressing envelopes for our own wedding, I spent so much time on Google trying to figure out the correct etiquette for every guest. To help save you from the same Google rabbit holes, I put together a complete (and free!) Envelope Addressing Guide that you can download at the bottom of this post.
But if you just want the highlights, here are answers to five common questions you may have while gathering addresses for your event…
1) When do children get their own invitation separate from their parents?
Any guest age 18 and up should get their own invitation, even if they are still living at home with their parents.
Tip #1: If a single woman is being sent her own invitation, the correct form of address is Ms. not Miss, which should be reserved only for girls under the age of 18.
Tip #2: Nonbinary guests who prefer to use they/them pronouns may also prefer to be addressed as Mx.
2) What if my married friend didn’t take her husband’s last name?
If a married woman does not share her husband’s last name, she should be addressed as Ms., rather than Mrs. This goes for hyphenated last names as well.
3. How do I address envelopes to my married same-sex friends?
If your friends share a last name, they are listed together as either The Mesdames or The Messrs. You can list the first names alphabetically, or put your closest friend first.
If your friends don’t share a last name, list them separately on the same line, as shown in question 2.
4. What if my friend has a distinguished title, but her husband doesn’t?
Distinguished titles always come first, regardless of gender.
5. I want to invite my friends’ children. How do I include them?
Children under 18 can be listed underneath their parents’ names. (This is when it’s okay to use Miss!) And remember, all guests age 18 and up should be sent their own invitation.
To recap: Anyone 18 and older should get their own invitation; list your married friends who share a last name as “Mr. and Mrs.”, “The Mesdames”, or “The Messrs.”; married friends who don’t share a last name are listed separately on the same line (and address women as “Ms.”); guests with distinguished titles are always listed first; and children can be listed under their parents.
Still have questions? To get into the nitty gritty and for answers to every other addressing question you’ll encounter, submit your email below and get access to my Envelope Addressing Guide. It goes even more in depth in an easy to follow format that will let you move on to the more enjoyable aspects of planning your special event (like tasting things)!
Hire me to address your envelopes for your next big event! Find my prices and a gallery of past projects on my Services page.